A counselllor's job is to help their clients/friends/family to help themselves. To counsel someone...we need them to open up to us right? To make them feel safe enough to be open about their thoughts and feelings...they must be in an environment(which you should create!) where they feel safe, respected and understood. These are the list of skills you should have:
The Counsellor must_____ so that the patient can_____!
- Listen ; develop his/her thinking
- Not judge ; feel safe and respected
- Pay attention ; know you care
- Accept their feelings ; know that they are not being judged
- Understand the client(put yourself in their shoes) ; know that you are with them no matter what
- Think about the client ; get the best assistance you can give
The Counsellor may_____ so the patient can_____!
- Ask questions ; develop their thinking deeper
- Summarize ; hear their own thoughts and feelings being understood
- Ask the patient to change their behaviour ; release blocked emotions or whatever...
Counsellors should not_____ this will make the patient_____!
- Argue ; be in the defense mode
- Talk about their own problems ; think that they are wasting their time
- Should not solve the problems for them (unless necessary!) ; overly dependant
- Give advice ; dependant or hostility (depends on how they interpret the advice)
- Belittle the patients' concern ; withdrawal for the shy and possible attack by the aggresive
- Avoid painful areas (blast them away...hahaha) ; be frustrated because their stressor is not being talked about
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